404·Quotes

Gallery 0002 — permanent collection

Friendship

Friendship has no ceremony, no contract and no legal standing. Everyone here is trying to explain why it nevertheless holds.

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Two and a half thousand years, one test

Euripides wrote that friends show their love in trouble in the fifth century BC. Gracián put it as arithmetic in 1647. Keller made it about walking in the dark. The formulation keeps changing and the finding never does — the quality of a friendship is not observable in good conditions, because good conditions do not ask anything of it. Everything in this room that sounds warm is, on inspection, a test.

Cicero wrote the definitive text and then ran out of time

The oldest lines in this room are from De Amicitia, written in 44 BC. Cicero was assassinated the following year. He wrote it at sixty-two, after Caesar's murder, out of political favour and with most of his friends dead or on the other side — which is worth knowing before reading his definition of a friend as a second self. Two thousand years later C. S. Lewis wrote The Four Loves and arrived at substantially the same place by a different route. Four of the lines here carry a finding; friendship attracts more invented quotations than almost any other theme in the museum.

What is the best short quote about friendship?

Elbert Hubbard’s — “a friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.” It is nine words and contains the whole idea, which is that friendship is what survives full information.

Where does the C. S. Lewis friendship quote come from?

The Four Loves, published in 1960, in which Lewis distinguishes affection, friendship, romantic love and charity. The “What! You too?” passage is from the chapter on friendship.

Did Rumi say “Friendship is the bond of the soul.”?

Popular English Rumi is almost always a modern rendering rather than a translation — most often Coleman Barks, who works from other scholars’ literal versions and writes his own free English. The wording here is therefore a modern author’s; the idea is Rumi’s. Where no Persian original could be matched, the label says attributed. It is filed here as attributed to Rumi, which means widely credited and not traced to a primary source.

What is the full version of “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, ‘What!…”?

As published the line reads: “Friendship, I have said, is born at the moment when one man says to another "What! You too? I thought that no one but myself...".” The version in circulation, and the one shown here, has drifted from it. The collection cites it to The Four Loves, 1960.

Did Helen Keller say “Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the ligh…”?

As published the line reads: “I would rather walk with a friend in the dark than walk alone in the light.” The version in circulation, and the one shown here, has drifted from it. It is filed here as attributed to Helen Keller, which means widely credited and not traced to a primary source.

Did Elbert Hubbard say “A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.”?

Credited to Hubbard on social media rather than in his work. The sentiment is much older — Proverbs 17:17 has “a friend loves at all times”. It is filed here as attributed to Elbert Hubbard, which means widely credited and not traced to a primary source.

Next door, in the dictionary

sonder

the realisation that everyone else has an interior life as full as yours.

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Next door